Plums from the Village - Ep 04: A New Spring

My new outfit

I am writing this letter from the dining hall in Upper Hamlet. Outside, chirping birds and a gentle
winter sun are whispering the arrival of spring. Spring! The daffodils have budded already here in southern France. It will be my first spring in eight years. The past years, i always spent this time of year in India, and missed out on my favorite season. That first fresh spring breeze, always feels like something melting inside of you, something you forgot was stuck frozen inside, like the refreshing dusting off of feelings that disappeared by the wayside of your daily struggle and strife. In the back of my head, an old folk song by our most beloved Dutch folk singer plays ‘every new spring, everything is new for me.’

A new spring, a new song. It feels like a fresh start. I just got back to Plum Village after a month break after the rains retreat. I paid a very short visit to Belgium, just long enough to catch up with a few close friends and family members. Afterwards, for three weeks I was back in Sadhana Forest, India. It was a joyful reunion with many friends to whom i said goodbye last May. It did feel like coming home. This special forest will forever have a special place in my heart, and will be one of the places i will be proud to call home.

My visit to Sadhana Forest was also a good way to test my mindfulness. Would i be able to feel the effect of three months of intense retreat upon returning to my old environment and my old activities? Would i be able to carry the calm and peace of Plum Village with me, or would they disappear like snow in the tropical sun? Quite soon after i arrived, they asked me to help out with different projects. It was like i never left. Still, it felt different this time. The practice of Plum Village seemed to work! I did things a little bit more slowly and consciously. I tried not to multitask, but to focus on the task at hand. I rushed less, but walked mindfully to all my meetings. I chose to take it easy in my free time and to not go out too often. I mostly stayed at home and followed the community activities (although i did attend my beloved kalari – Indian martial art – classes). In this way, i managed to take up the same activities again, all while feeling less restless and stressed. This gives me confidence for the future!

Many reunions in the forest

Saying goodbye was difficult yet again, but at the end of my trip, i also felt excited to return to Plum Village and to formally start my preparation for monk life. The day after my arrival, i already received a blue robe (see photo). I am now officially an ‘aspirant’, a monk to be. The blue robe is not a monk’s robe, it is the robe that Vietnamese lay people traditionally wear when visiting a temple. Here it is the uniform of the monk trainees. The coming months, together with my 9 fellow aspirants, i will have weekly classes about what it means to be a monk, about the deep aspiration that comes with it, the meditation exercises and – last but not least – the etiquette, because etiquette is also an important part of a traditional institution like monkhood.

How does all this make me feel? Well, i'm just living life day by day, and there is an underlying feeling of deep calm and peace, which i can tap into whenever i breathe, behave and walk slowly and mindfully. Having a robe definitely helps in this regard. It reminds me (and those around me) of my aspiration to live consciously. I count my blessings to have conditions to live such a privileged life. I don’t have to work, nor do i have any real responsibilities. I can fully focus on that which i enjoy most: meditation, living with awareness en creating deep connection with people. Once in a while, my old resistance crops up: Can i do this? Is it allowed? Shouldn’t i be working hard? Yet, i try to convince myself that i can allow myself to do that which i enjoy the most, and that doing so, in its own way, will have an impact on the world. Other than that, i am also curious about the things i will learn here in the coming months (and years). The life of a monk is a special practice that requires meticulousness and has its own specific points of attention. I am curious what i will come out of this experience.